Giving yourself grace in grief sounds simple.
Until you’re the one who has to do it.
Because we can be so hard on ourselves.
We think we should be handling things better by now.
We get frustrated when we cancel plans.
When we can’t focus.
When we have a good day and then fall apart the next.
When something we thought we could handle turns out to be too much.
We question why we’re still struggling with things that used to come so easily.
But grief takes a lot out of you.
Some days, getting through the day really is enough.
You don’t have to explain why you’re tired.
You don’t have to feel guilty for saying no.
You don’t have to force yourself to be social.
You don’t have to make everyone else comfortable with where you are.
And you don’t have to keep expecting yourself to function exactly like you did before your life changed.
Giving yourself grace doesn’t mean giving up on yourself.
It means recognizing that you’re going through something incredibly hard and treating yourself accordingly.
Maybe today you do less.
Maybe you change your mind.
Maybe you cry.
Maybe you laugh and actually enjoy yourself.
Maybe you need people.
Maybe you want to be left alone.
None of those things need to be justified.
Grief asks enough of you already.
You don’t need to make it harder by expecting yourself to be okay before you are.
If these words connected with you, you’ll find many more like them in What Remains. It’s a collection of the writings I’ve shared over the years, bringing together reflections on grief, love, loss, and the connections that continue long after someone is gone.
I hope it brings you comfort, understanding, and the reminder that you’re not alone.
If you’d like to read more, you can find the book here
Available now on Amazon